From Perpetual Worrier to the Just For Me Warrior…

Sometimes I think I worry too much.  Okay….ALL the time I think I worry too much.  I worry about my kids, my future, their future, finances, floods, fire, work, other people, my health, my kids’ health, my husband’s health, his future, the future of the world, politics, God, religion, aliens (do they exist or not), and pretty much every little thing you could possibly think about that might exist.  The spider that was crawling on the wall five minutes ago, but that is now nowhere to be seen- yeah, I worry about that too.  I mean, what if it creeps down in the middle of the night and lands on my face?  YUCK!  But, the worrying can sometimes land a person in this zone known as Blahsville.  It’s a perpetual worry-zone full of angst, stress, and anxiety- followed up by depression.  For the first time in over twenty years, I found myself explaining all of this to my doctor.  I hate medication and, being honest, not a huge fan of doctor offices either.  But, here I was explaining all my feelings at length.  So, he gave me a prescription to try.  We’ll see how that goes.  Of course, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried about side-effects and such.  Let’s be honest…if you ever read labels and things for these medications, you would be worried also.  I just want to say this, however, that I don’t think bravery had anything to do with going to the doctor.  In the midst of talking to my doctor’s nurse, that’s one of the things she said to me.  I think of it as more of a last ditch effort to get some sort of peace and calm in my life.  Life can truly make you feel crazy.  It’s always rush rush rush, go here, do this, do that….gotta GO GO GO!!  At what point does a person have TIME to “stop and smell the roses”?  It’s difficult, for sure, but I have determined that I will MAKE TIME!!  This blog, I believe, is a good start.  If I’m going to fight the good fight, it should be for a good cause:  Five minutes, at the very least, every day…just for me

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