Dear Diary…or some such garbage

I’ve started blogs about certain aspects of my life before, and those have not been very successful.  Mostly, it’s because I feel constricted by the elements that I have limited those blogs to be about.  I wanted to do something a little different for, not only myself, but for my writing.  I’m prone to reading people’s opinions every day, and in my daily working life I deal with more of the same.  Over and over again, I hear things that enrage me, delight me, or make me feel very sad.  To say the least, I ride an emotional roller coaster.  I’ve written before about my ADHD, my autism, and my sensory processing disorder.  I’ve shared anecdotes about my anxiety and depression.  I’ve even shared stories about what it was like to go back to work after being a stay at home mom for almost 20 years.  What I haven’t done is just be myself.  In short, it’s always been easier for me to be anything other than me.  People have a hard time accepting me for everything and all that I am.  The truth is, however, that I am not ever going to change who I am.  Yes, I do see the world very differently than most people do.  It’s not a bad thing, but it does make me unique in my own ways.  I suppose some people might call me odd, or eccentric, or even weird.  In some circles, I am more commonly known as a “rhymes with witch”.  It’s probably not the nicest thing I’ve ever been called, but it certainly isn’t the worst thing either.  It isn’t that I don’t care, although I feel that sometimes I care a bit too much about what others might think of me.  Perhaps I do care a little too much, but I fear the consequences of caring too little.  So, I shall choose to care ONLY a little.  In relation to this blog, however, I shall care not one bit.  Read or don’t.  Like or don’t.  This one is just for me.  It is an outlet by which I shall unload my anxieties and such.  I make no promises of content, but I do promise to myself to be content.  And so it begins.

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